The World Series wrapped up this week.  Even though I’m a Mets fan, I was delighted to see that the Atlanta Braves won the championship, requiring feckless baseball Commissioner Manfred to present the trophy to the team from the State from which he removed the All-Star Game for illegitimate political purposes.  Even better, he had to give the trophy to the team named “Braves,” whose fans insist on performing the, admittedly annoying, and thoroughly anti-P.C., tomahawk chop.  Delightful.  People For The Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA) used the occasion of the World Series to make another attempt to impose a speech code on America.  We have a First Amendment, you see, which is supposed to confer upon each and every American the right to speak his or her mind, regardless of whether somebody out there in the public doesn’t like it, doesn’t agree with it, or is made uncomfortable by it.  The Supreme Court has repeatedly reminded us that we don’t have speech codes in America.  The Court’s advice, “Avert your ears.”  As long as what you say isn’t a crime, a true threat to another, or likely to motivate a reasonable person to violence, it’s protected by the Constitution.  However, PETA doesn’t agree with the law.  PETA has tried to censor our language before.  They’ve previously “suggested” other language restrictions.  For instance, don’t say “kill two birds with one stone,” say, “feed two birds with one scone.”  (I guess PETA condones feeding birds fattening pastry).  Don’t say, “bring home the bacon,” say “bring home the bagels.” (I thought bagels had too many carbs).  Don’t say, “take the bull by the horns,” say “take the flower by the thorns.” (Sounds kind of masochistic to me).  Now, to coincide with the Fall Classic, PETA is tilting at a new windmill.  The latest addition to the PETA speech code would do away with the term “bullpen.”  They suggest “Arm Barn” as an alternative.  Apparently, PETA finds it unacceptable to refer to the place where baseball pitchers prepare to enter a game as “the bullpen.”  Somehow the name “bullpen” must be hurtful to bulls.  Of course, this presupposes that PETA somehow knows what bulls think.  Bull whisperers?  More like bullshitters.  So, what about bullpens?  On the website Mental Floss, David K. Israel explored the origin of the term “bullpen,” and came up with six possibilities.  1) Fans in the cheapest part of the ballpark were herded into a roped-off area that resembled a cattle pen.  2) The pitchers warmed up in front of Bull Durham tobacco signs.  3) (This one could have triggered PETA) – The incoming pitcher was being led to the slaughter.  4) Casey Stengel’s theory –  “bullpen” came from the place where extra pitchers sat “shooting the bull” until called upon. (I’m sure PETA would object to the notion of shooting any bull, but this bolsters the bullshit theory).  5) The rodeo theory – bulls were kept in pens before entering the contest.  6) The New York Giants theory – The Giants played at the Polo Grounds, which actually had a bull pen, next to which pitchers warmed up.  As the simplest possibility, this one is likely correct, but the point is, who cares?  Do the animal rights people actually expect Joe Buck to replace “bullpen” with “Arm Barn?”  For what?  To protect bulls?  From what?  There once was bullfighting, which was horribly barbaric, but not so much anymore.  Bullfighting is widely considered to be inhumane, and has been outlawed in most places.  Even in Spain, where bullfighting originated, the practice is discouraged.

That was once the bullring in Barcelona.  When bullfighting was outlawed in Catalonia, they turned it into a shopping mall.  I’m not sure which use is the more repugnant.  Anyhow, what’s the obsession with bulls?  PETA never complained about “bull in a china shop.”  Other animal terms are actually flattering.  Wise as an owl.  Sly as a fox.  Okay, so “bird brain” and “going batty” may not be so positive, but “strong like bull” is pretty good.  “Mess with the bull and you get the horns” is good advice.  So what’s so bad about a bullpen?  Maybe PETA only approves of free range bulls.  Or maybe it’s just bullshit.  Maybe, just maybe, PETA, and every other Woke, goody-goody, well-meaning, holier than thou, interest group wants to occupy us with worrying about mere words, so we’ll be too busy to notice that our freedoms are being pulled from us one by one.  We used to say, “sticks and stones will break my bones, but words will never hurt me.”  In Woke Snowflake Land, it’s more like, “picking up sticks and stones is work Americans won’t do, and we don’t do any meaningful work, so words are all we’ve got.”  In First Amendment law there’s a concept known as “fighting words,” words which by their very utterance, inflict injury or tend to incite an immediate breach of the peace.  For Woke imbeciles, any words they hear that don’t square 100% with what they want are fighting words.  If you’re triggered by the word “bullpen,” you’re the one with the problem, and you should seek help.  And what’s with Leftists and “triggers.”  I thought they didn’t like guns.  So “Arm Barns” instead of “bullpens?”  I think not.  How about Ass Hats.